In our nation there is a significant amount of change, especially compared to a few places in the world that have all the same people growing up and living their entire lives there with no new people joining them. We are the richer for all the new experiences we get from moving and from having new people in our lives. And yet with all the changes of people coming in and out of our lives, we feel sad at how hard it is for many of us to settle and feel socially connected. We acknowledge that it is not always easy to accept strangers in our midst – we like our own comfort zones too – and we don’t always know the best way to make them feel genuinely at home. But what is really hard to accept is when newcomers are consciously made to feel uncomfortable… we have such high empathy for anyone who is treated badly!
But loneliness is not always a result of how others treat you. We are also saddened if you are unable to see how you might be making your own loneliness worse… when your heart and head are still completely in your former place in New Zealand or in your birth country, and you too find it hard to relate to these “new people”. And just as we feel for those unsettled within our beautiful country, we too feel for our Kiwis experiencing similar loneliness overseas.
Humans are strong and resilient in so many ways… and yet we can also be so fragile! When we feel dislocated for any length of time we sometimes slump into loneliness, making our situation all the harder to deal with… especially without help.
Whatever your circumstance, we just want you to know that you’re not alone feeling like this… sadly there are many people like you who feel loneliness.
Our aim is to help get you to better understand yourself, others and the world you are in – to help you move from the very low loneliness you are in to a space where you feel more able to connect well with yourself, and other people.
We have written some pages on dislocated people and loneliness for you to possibly identify with or learn more from. We also appreciate that everyone’s situation is unique so if your cause of experiencing loneliness is not on one of these pages, or elsewhere in our “I’m feeling lonely” section of the website, we are still here for you.
People feel lonely for many reasons. To learn more about dislocated and lonely categories, select one of the coloured boxes below, or scroll down the “I’m feeling lonely” menu.